Reassessing Happiness, Redefining Success

To be completely honest, I felt to some extent, a considerable amount of shame for feeling so foreign in a local Malaysian setting. This made me realise the true degree of diversity that exists in Malaysia and how much of it yet to be discovered.

For those who don’t know, the people in Bario are mostly Kelabit but there are also a number of Penan people living there. Life in Bario was fairly different for me – and it was a change that I thoroughly enjoyed and now, miss. However, I have come to understand that this change is not always viewed positively.

Sometimes, some people come into Bario and quickly assume that the people there live difficult and unhappy lives. Difficult life might be true to some extent, probably because the work in Bario is mostly laborious. Unhappy? This I will have to disagree.

It’s so fundamentally flawed to think that just because someone doesn’t want, need or have the same things (tangible or intangible) that you do, their sense of happiness is less valid - because it is not.

Bario reminded me that different people can live life differently – and that is okay. It really is.

Another realisation I acquired in Bario was through my teaching experience at SMK Bario. I went to SMK Bario twice to teach English (teach = playing English games) to Form 1 and 2 students. I started by asking the students what they wanted to become in the future.  Teacher and doctor were frequent answers. But of course, there were some others such as astronaut, policeman, fireman, and fisherman.

It is through this that I realised that there’s something severely flawed with the way we (not everyone, but a lot of people) think of ambitions and aspirations. We often encourage students to become doctors, engineers, scientists, among others – and tell them that they are “on the right track”. We discourage those who want to become policemen, farmers, fishermen, among others – and tell them to dream higher to achieve "more".

This needs to change. We need to encourage students to be successful in whatever they want to become and whatever profession they choose to work. The idea of being successful too, needs to be changed. Being successful should not be about being able to make a lot of money – but being good at what you do, and enjoying what you do.

Anyway, I don’t think the world can survive if we all decided to become doctors, right?

Kan Wai Min